Happiness is Valuable: Invest in it!

Here's a great job to have: Head of Happiness!

A company in the UK called "SuperStars" (a brilliant company that provides physical education, art, music and theatre programs for schools and for parents, for summer and break times, before and after-school, and parties) has hired a head of happiness to ensure that its employees are more engaged, more creative, more productive, more loyal, all the things that happier employees can be.

I just read an article about their commitment to keeping their employees happy and fulfilled. It's called So, what makes YOUR workforce happy? Why putting a smile on your workers' faces is a serious business. The article says that if employees have fun, feel valued, find meaning and purpose in their work, and have opportunities to learn and grow, they feel happier. And, happier employees are better employees.

That might seem obvious to you, but is it happening where you work? If things seem obvious, sometimes we don't pay enough attention to them. We know workplace happiness is important, but are we putting time and money into it?

• Does your boss provide you with opportunities to learn and grow?
• Do you feel valued, appreciated? 
• Is your work meaningful? 
• Are there events that you can participate in that help you and your colleagues to feel happier? 
• Do you feel engaged, part of a team? 
• Are you making an effort to keep positive and to help your colleagues to feel positive too? 
• How do you keep happy at work? 
• What do you do to make things better? 

Think about it. Invest some time in your workplace happiness.

Choose Optimism for Yourself and Your Loved Ones

This showed up on my Facebook feed this morning. 

I had never thought of complaining as an addiction, but I guess that those who do complain constantly must get some kick out of it. Maybe they think it's cool? It makes them appear grown-up, or important? Whatever benefit they imagine can't make up for the damage, though. It's got to be depressing and destructive to hear yourself repeat all those negative things all the time. It will probably turn off potential friends and clients and affect your success, giving you even more to complain about. In fact, studies have shown that negativity and complaining are bad for the brain. Repeated negativity is actually bad for the speaker and the listener. (check out this article) And so, I've discovered that it's a lot like smoking.

I'm a positive thinker, but I get dragged down frequently. I'm exposed to a great deal of complaining and it brings me down. I don't feel any of the benefits that you might feel when complaining. My empathy just makes me feel sad and stressed, and sometimes I'm exhausted from listening to your problems and complaints and criticisms. It's very much like the second-hand smoke I had to deal with when I was a child. I was exposed to a lot of cigarette smoke and had trouble with allergies and asthma, but not anymore.

Luckily, I never started to smoke even though I grew up with a smoker as a parent.

I won't pick up the complaining habit either.

I choose optimism for my own health and for my family's.

Feel-Good Music

Keep this song in your favourite list, or bookmark it, or whatever you need to do so you can find it when you need it!

Music is a cheap and healthy mood-altering drug. Keep some handy for whatever mood you want to experience. If you want to read more about how music affects our moods, take a look at my other blog, Musical Empathy.

This song, Happy, is perfect. You'll be sure to find it when you need a lift. It says clap along if you want to, but you'll really want to wiggle and dance along! It's so much fun!

Simple and direct title, eh?

Body Language: Fake it till you become it

This Ted Talk,

Amy Cuddy: Your body language shapes who you are

which came to me via Facebook (I spend way too much time on FB), arrived at a perfect time for me.

I just turned 50, this week, and I know it's not such a big deal, and I tried not to make a big deal of it, but the half-century milestone apparently is a big deal. Lots of people are making a big deal of my 50th birthday and tell me stories of their own big plans for theirs, past or future.

So many people are surprised that I'm 50! They remark again and again that I look so young! They would never have guessed that I'm 50.

So, I'm not young, but look shockingly young for someone so old?!!! I know, I know; that's not what they mean. They're trying to compliment me. And, I do feel flattered.

But, it makes me wonder.

What is it that makes me youthful?

My good skin? I don't have many wrinkles, okay almost none, but I do have large pores, some acne, and those little veins on my cheeks from the sun. I don't wear makeup, or do anything special with creams and things, so it's not good cosmetics.

I colour my hair, so you can't see the grey. Covering grey helps, but lots of octogenarians do too.

My clothes? Not likely. I do a lot of second-hand shopping. No high-fashion items, nothing trendy in my closet.

I have young children. I had my youngest at 36, so I'm older than other mothers of 13-year-olds. Calculate child's age plus 25-30 and I'm a decade older than your calculation. That could be the simple answer to the shock. Wow, math.

I like to think that I appear to be younger than I am because of the presence that I generally have, the way I stand and walk in the world. My optimism, confidence, and enthusiasm make me pretty and young. Somehow, they show. Maybe that's in my body language.

I've always been aware of the positive feedback loop of body language. It's just like the mirror neurons that make you smile when someone else is smiling, and then make you feel more positive. You might be triggered to yawn just reading the word yawn. You stand akimbo like Wonder Woman, smile and speak with confidence, and you feel stronger, and people see you as being in charge, then you feed off of that too.

I try to stand and sit tall, and am aware of the suck-in-your-gut magic weight loss trick. Mostly, I try not to worry too much about my weight and my skin and hair and all those things that the media want me to worry about. Let it go. I spend my energy on being present in the moment, listening, participating, laughing, crying. I smile a lot.

This Ted Talk is about non-verbal expressions of power and dominance, and using "power posing" to achieve success, but I think it's also about being positive in general. Standing tall and having a good attitude about yourself and the world is powerful. Being negative and having a bad attitude about yourself and the world is also powerful, powerfully unattractive.

I agree that power posing can change your life in meaningful ways. I also believe that being positive attracts positive people and even positive outcomes- good luck some might say.

When I'm super-nervous before a show, I try to smile and stand tall. I positively strut on stage. I beam out at the audience and then I beam at my choir. People are always shocked when they hear that I was nervous. Not only did I fool all of them, the choir and the audience, but I also fooled myself. My powerful persona takes over and it's wonderful. We all benefit.

So, I'm going to keep on being optimistic, confident, and enthusiastic, and continue to be present in the moment, and I hope to continue to shock people with how young and calm I appear.

New perspective on the half-full glass

This was posted on Facebook and I shared it there, so now I'm sharing it here too. This is a really good reminder to take charge of the stuff going on in your head, to look at things differently to create a more positive life. 

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?” Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.” Remember to put the glass down.

Happy New Year! New Beginnings can even start today!

Well, it's January 10th and I should have resolved to write more often, to exercise more often, to eat better, and all those good things on January 1st. But, I think it's not too late to start now. At 11:45 on a Friday, I can resolve to begin to write more and be a better, healthier person.

I wrote about starting things at odd times for my Renate's Baton Blog. Here's a link to that post. On and around New Year's Day, I do wish people Happy New Year and wish them health and happiness, and I also wish those things for myself. But, I haven't done the New Year's Resolutions thing in a long time. I'm still not going to make a list, but I will be resolute for a while about starting off the year positively.

I'm turning 50 next month, and it's kind of looming. Sometimes it looms large and other times I think I can just ignore it. There are times when I don't think about it at all, but it keeps popping up.

I like how the Persians call the new year "Now Ruz" New Day. It reminds me that every day is a new day and every moment can bring change.

Celebrate the new day. Resolve to do something new any time, even now. I'm going to.